“Spend all of your time on those things you value most — on those things which you believe go beyond the here-and-now. The more time you can spend on things you believe to be of infinite worth, the more powerful your daily life and behavior will be.” Benjamin Hardy
Making changes in one’s life is difficult. It is hard to push through even a single change; we are creatures of habit. We like the predictability of knowing what is going to happen next in our lives. Changes are fought tooth and nail. We want things to stay the same. That’s why New Year’s resolutions don’t work: the energy required to make the change is far more than we are willing and sometimes able to give.
Resolutions often fail because we have not really ‘resolved’ to do anything. We have made a decision to, for example, lose weight, but have not made specific plans for how that is going to come about. When a strong temptation comes, we easily slip up and try that left over fruit cake or chocolate. And once you slip, it seems to be human nature accept the failure and fall back onto one’s old ways. Where was the decision? Where did the resolve go?
Priorities are different than resolutions. A true priority is something that is extremely important to you and that you will strive to work toward come what may and regardless of single actions. A priority is based on what you value. A priority comes before anything else. By definition then we have few priorities; just a few things that we hold above other things in importance.
“Priorities are the most fundamental and powerful thing in your life–they reflect your values and goals.” Benjamin Hardy
If I choose to make a healthy body a priority in my life, then I don’t need to make a resolution: I do those things which will create a healthy body. I will ask how I can achieve this healthy body. I will read about it. I will make decisions about food, exercise and activities that will work toward this priority. I will measure the changes until I achieve that healthy body and I will continue to maintain it. Along the way I will have learned and applied much about this priority. I’ll be less likely to skip exercise or eat food that conflicts with my priority.
A number of years ago I made recovery a priority in my life. It still is a priority. Am I perfect at it? No. And I still work on it in all parts of my life. These past few months I have made writing a priority. So I am doing all the things that make writing an integral part of my life. I am learning about techniques, I am part of a writers’ group. I believe that writing is important for me so I write something everyday.
I choose my priorties in life. I don’t give that option to anyone else. I strive to spend a lot of my time writing. Am I always successful? No. But it is a priority so if I fall short I can pick myself up and move forward.
This year, don’t make resolutions. Why not take the time to do some reflection and decide what your priorities in life really are. When you know ‘who’ you want to be and ‘why’ you want to be that way, then the ‘how’ of achieving it will naturally follow.
Happy New Year!
Read Benjamin Hardy’s full article here: 30 Behaviors That Will Make You Unstoppable
6 thoughts on “Priorities not Resolutions”
Yas! Relate to this very much. Never been too good on those resolutions.
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Great post. Happy new year!
Reblogged this on Explorations of Inventories and commented:
Arguably, both lists (priorities and resolutions) are either inventories or points of departure for inventories. Any given entry in the list can be scrutinized in more detail.
Most years, I make the list in October or November and start testing each item in November or December. Unworkable items are dropped. Good items are kept for the “official” January start.
A few items are tuned and tested again.
To be certain, “less is more.”. Short simple lists work best.
Totally agree about it. I believe resolutions are a fake face of what you expect, but knowing you won’t get, meanwhile priorities really matter in you head and heart so those are the importance ones.
I totally agree with you. Priorities need to be set and worked upon. Resolutions break all the time, becoming meaningless. Wonderful read. Happy new year Tim! 🙂
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